Apparently, God can even use depression for good.

Coming up on the end of our first year here in Benin, an evil old acquaintance began to hang around our house. I used to struggle with depression on a regular basis, but after reading Dr. Neil Nedley’s book about depression and putting his advice into practice, I had not experienced any serious bouts of depression for more than seven years. That was, until serious culture shock set in.

I found myself not able to sleep well, lacking energy, dwelling on the negative and morbid side of life, and generally in a very bad condition. Becoming very sensitive to the constant calls to me by just about anybody I pass in town, I found it hard to leave our house. The kids sing a little song to every white person, and hearing that song became unbearable to me. This culture shock is apparently something that often happens to missionaries after being in the field for a year or so, and AFM had done what they could to prepare us for this. In training, we were given a little book called Culture Shock, by Myron Loss. It is an older book and does not deal with depression as thoroughly as Dr. Nedley’s book does, but reading it was just what I needed a few months ago. It was a relief to be reminded that what I was going through is common to missionaries. Following the book’s advice, I talked to our team about it, and we found some practical things I could do to counteract the pull of depression. Those things included getting regular exercise, getting some professional help, and visiting Hyacinthe in Boukoumbe once a week.

Getting regular exercise was difficult at first because it meant going out more and hearing the annoying song, so I began taking long walks out in the countryside where I would meet fewer people. Each evening, instead of eating supper, I would head out for a long walk in the tall grass. After a few weeks of this, I noticed that I wasn’t as irritated anymore when people called out to me, and the children’s song became much less annoying to me. Often now, I hardly notice it. I have begun running regularly, which is a first for me, and it seems like a lot of my culture shock and depression gets left out there on the trails.

The best thing that has come out of my painful period of darkness is my weekly visits to Hyacinthe. Previously, Suzy was the one who kept in touch with Hyacinthe, who works for our team doing cultural research and evangelism. But when Suzy went on furlough, I took over working with Hyacinthe. It seemed like each time I visited Boukoumbe, somebody else was also visiting Hyacinthe. So, instead of the work-related topics I had planned, we ended up talking about worldview—what it is, how it affects our understanding of the Gospel, and how it can be changed. These are subjects that have excited me ever since I was introduced to them in AFM’s training. I struggled to express myself in French, but Hyacinthe already understood these subjects, having attended Phase-2 Training with us in Togo in 2011, so he helped me when my French failed me.

Each week, more and more people started showing up at Hyacinthe’s house, and we realized that maybe we should turn the visits into a teaching time. We began to meet at our house in Natitingou, since most of those attending were coming from there anyway. After a couple weeks, the group had outgrown our front porch, so Uli suggested we move to the study hut she and Toussaint have behind their house. Since then, once a week, 6 to 12 people have gathered at that hut to study together. Uli, Hyacinthe and I lead out in teaching while Toussaint cooks luscious food for the group. What started as therapy for me has turned into a full-blown (albeit small) training program that is producing lessons for evangelism among the Otammari people.

As we began by explaining what worldview is, we were able to move into AFM’s model of worldview-based evangelism. We first explained what each stage of this evangelistic model entails, and then we started coaching the attendees in preparing the lessons. Pascal and his friend Bernard have recorded four songs for the first stage of our evangelistic process, Spiritual Hunger Development. Hyacinthe is using them on his weekly radio program.

We recently had one of the best days of training yet. After listening to the discussion in Sabbath School one week, I realized how little some people understood the Gospel and salvation. On the next day of training, we spent the morning talking about what the Gospel is, comparing redemption from sin to redemption from slavery. We used different illustrations and questions to help people understand, but I was concerned that we were being too theoretical and not practical enough. AFM has taught us to present the Gospel as it is found in the Bible—as part of the overall story of the Bible and the great controversy between Christ and Satan. Instead of using proof texts, we have been taught to tell the Bible stories chronologically, laying a foundation for changing the worldview of the listeners.

After spending the morning talking about the Gospel as a concept, I realized we needed to get more practical. So, in the afternoon, we began to outline the story pool for our second stage of evangelism, which is the Clear Gospel Presentation. We first listed the questions and issues that need to be dealt with in order for Otammari people to understand the Gospel. For instance, people here know about Satan, but they believe he is their savior and mediator between God and man. We obviously need to work on changing their worldview on that issue if they are going to understand the great controversy as presented in the Bible! They also know a lot about sacrifice, but their understanding is very different from what the Bible teaches. Instead of expressing thankfulness for what God has done, the Otammari people offer endless sacrifices in an attempt to manipulate God and the spirits to get what they want.

After listing several questions and issues, we made a timeline covering 6,000 years and started putting up stories that would help deal with the questions and issues we had listed. I realized quickly that even a timeline is something strange to people who think of time as something cyclical, so our evangelistic strategy will need to deal with the issue of time, somehow helping people to understand the scope of the Bible story. Other missionaries have already dealt with this issue, though, so I am confident we will find satisfactory solutions.

As we began to put stories up on the blackboard in the study hut, lights began to come on in the minds of those sitting there. Perhaps for the first time, they were understanding the concept we have been trying to explain for months. We are going to be using a small selection of Bible stories to present the Gospel as the Bible presents it. This is something that has not happened here yet, even for the people who have been Adventists for years. As they thought about which stories to include, and whether each story was essential to explaining central aspects of the Gospel, it was as if they were seeing the Bible in a whole new light.

In the evening, as we wrapped up training for the day, those who had attended expressed how useful the day’s lessons had been. They said that the people who were not there that day had missed a lot. Even Hyacinthe, who probably understands the Gospel and the Bible better than any other Otammari Seventh-day Adventist in this area, said he had learned a lot, especially from the morning’s discussion. He said he would begin using the chronological Bible story method on his radio show right away.

From small beginnings, a powerful training program is developing, and we are praying that God will start a movement of churches planting churches among the Otammari people and beyond into other people groups.

Somewhere in all the running and training, I have almost forgotten that I was ever depressed! Once in a while I remember, and I praise God that He can even turn something dark and painful into an opportunity for people to hear His Gospel and respond to it.

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